Italian Food Do’s and Don’ts: The Gentle Rules of La Tavola

Being Italian means food isn’t just something we eat — it’s something we live. The table (la tavola) is where stories are told, arguments settled, laughter shared. And while every family has its ways, there are certain do’s and don’ts most of us grew up with. They’re not strict rules, but little signs of respect — for tradition, for the ingredients, and for the meal itself.

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve smiled when visitors innocently asked for parmesan on their spaghetti alle vongole, or when someone ordered a cappuccino after dinner. We don’t judge (well actually some do judge to be honest hahaha)— we just quietly shake our heads, because to us these things feel… so wrong.

So here’s a gentle guide, from an Italian who grew up with these rhythms, to help you eat in harmony with our traditions.

Do’s 🍝

• Do enjoy cappuccino only in the morning. After breakfast, it’s espresso time — small, strong, simple.
• Do eat regionally. In Italy, every place has its pride. When you’re in Rome, order carbonara or Cacio e pepe. In Naples, try the seafood etc. Respect the roots and you’ll have a better experience.
• Do use bread for “fare la scarpetta.” It’s perfectly fine to scoop up the last of the sauce — in fact, it’s almost a compliment to the cook. Maybe not something we do in a very fine dine restaurant but otherwise yes.
• Do linger at the table. Food is never rushed here. Meals are as much about conversation as they are about what’s on the plate.
• Do follow the seasons. Strawberries in May, porcini in autumn, citrus in winter. Nature sets the menu.

Don’ts 🚫

• Don’t ask for cheese on seafood pasta. It breaks the balance of flavors. Trust me, it’s better without.
• Don’t press the garlic, just chop it. That way you won’t get that typical aftertaste.
• Don’t drink cappuccino after lunch or dinner. Milk after a meal feels too heavy. Espresso is the proper ending.
• Don’t mix chicken with pasta. Pasta is a first course, never a sidekick.
• Don’t order pasta and risotto in the same meal. Choose one primo, then move to a secondo. Balance is everything.
• Don’t rush. Eating quickly or distractedly is almost unthinkable — meals are sacred pauses.

Why These Traditions Matter

They’re not rules to trap you — they’re part of the flow of Italian life. They protect harmony, balance, and the joy of the table. For us, food is not just nourishment. It’s memory, identity, and belonging.

And once you step into these rhythms, you’ll see that the do’s and don’ts aren’t limits at all — they’re the secret to why Italian food feels so timeless.